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No, but seriously. Can you just suck it up and start using your right hand like everyone else in the developed world? You’re making us look bad with all your creativity and success. It’s like you’re part of a secret club we can never join. And frankly, the rest of us have the right to feel left out. See what I did there? That’s the best thing a right-hander can come up with. We need you weirdos.
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